Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Okada Riding

Now if you grew up Naija propa, you have ridden an okada countless times. And you have liked it.  I know some of you were banned from it by your parents so no be your fault. As for me, na different story.
Here is an old one I wrote about Okada riding a while back.

A true Nigerian is not afraid of all those okada accident stories. Abeg, as far as I am concerned, they do not exist! If you tell your non-Nigerian friends that you used to get on a motocycle to move about, please be sure to describe what it looks like before they start thinking you were on a Harley.There is usually a cluster of them waiting at a junction, looking something...well exactly like this if in larger clusters.
Here is a guide on how to pick your okada driver carefully:

1. Do not go for the ones calling you (for the girls). Don’t answer to,”Bebi!”, “Ay! Fine gal!” and the young ones who give what they are convinced is a charming smile.

2. Head for the quiet one (usually old) who is absentmindedly polishing the dullness of his machine. Be sure to ask how much first because they will cheeeeeat you! “Ha! Na 50 naira oh! I no say where you get 20 from!” And they will WAIT for you to go find the other 30. They just might walk into your house if you take too long. So haggle on a price my dear. Remember, this is Nigeria, you NEVER pay the asking price for anything!
Okada drivers know how to get EVERYWHERE! Just give them a number. If you have the same travel routine, that absentminded okada man will recognize you and will EXPECT you to walk up to him. An okada can fit many many people so share with your friends! There is no limit!
Now, not all okadas will just be sitting on the road for you. To hail down one you must stick out your hand and look the man dead in the eye. If it is early in the morning, just stand there and look miserable. Maintain eye contact. The okada is fast and sometimes the driver will think that he is in an action movie with his deep corner turns that will leave you concerned for your safety. Just enjoy the wind in your face my friend! If it is raining, hide behind the driver because the raindrops will feel like constant and painful stings.
Signs of a regular okada rider? A nice circular scar on your calf. For the ladies, be careful on getting on okada in a skirt ooooh! A panty shot will be the delight and talk among the drivers for an hour or more. Wait for the driver to tilt the machine and hike up your skirt.There is a certain facial expression that goes with the hiking of a skirt but that’s a different story.
If you have never been on one, remove yourself from house fast fast and find one. 

They will be waiting for you.


  1. You are so funny! Like when you use nigerian slangs

  2. very true, hehehehehehe @Signs of a regular okada rider? A nice circular scar on your calf.